Another one from August 30th 2008

/ 김유화

FAMILY

For this is the most precious you have in life. Do not think otherwise! Let them always know that!

Especially in hard times like these. You need family and good friends. Do not think that you get through this alone as i do.. Because that is not true! 

I sit at times, both home and at work. Thinking about my situation. My feelings inside, I can feel my tears in my eyes. But what do i do? 

Nothing – i swallow this with “pride” and pretend. BUT I’m done pretending! I cannot go around pretending to be a superwoman – though I do from time to time. But this is bringing back a lot of old feelings and thoughts too.

I know that we are all humans. And last night my mom told me; “there are two things that are certain in life and that is that we are born and that we are going to die.” And then she said something like this; “When you are dead you are hidden, but not forgotten.” That made me feel a little better. 

Because i have to say that i have not been at the graves of those whom i lost in life that often. That is not because i do not want to, but I am kind of afraid. For my own feelings and reactions. So i have to learn to let go of my controlling being and let it rip sometimes.

So I am not happy all time – I am actually very often sad and feeling misplaced.
But i dearly love my family and friends! So know this i will always be here, through good, bad, happiness and sadness! Anytime, anywhere!

Love you all!!

© Aug. 2008 Lady AhY

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