As earlier it has come to my attention and knowledge that I have another side of the stories of my life. I think I have to “re-talk” talks after I have had them.
Like I went to my psychiatrist today, because my meds do not work as they should and I had questions about my hospitalization. Then he told me that I need help, asked if I had called my doctor. I don’t remember him telling me I have to call my doctor for an appointment..
So my diagnose so far is Bipolar.. It’s hard getting through the days without feeling that I bring others around me down. I don’t want this feeling anymore. The voices are less vicious, but they still talk about me. I try so hard to stay positive around the people I love, but it takes a hell lot of energy to keep me here and I am flat out exhausted afterwards. I guess it is weird for you that don’t have this disease to understand us, and I got you. But just be patient with us, we are good people, we just project wrong sometimes. I wish there was a way to show you how my world are.. How to see the inside of someone that always feel misplaced..
I spent the day with family, my mom, sister and brother! These people are my heart, I love them so much. I had a good day! But I am exhausted and tired now, my head is heavy and my body numb. So I will recuperate and chill with How I Met Your Mother!