The Aftermath

In all fairness, I have not been feeling good lately. I was discharged on the 24th of May and moved out to the country side for a while. I have just been hanging around the house, cooking, cleaning and so on. This is a “safe” place, where I can relax and just be me while I search on my inside for answer. I have the diagnose Bipolar Disorder, BPD, Anxiety Disorder and PTSD. With this the medicine comes, I am not sure how much of an impact they have, except for giving me constipation and it is pain!

The time has in some way been standing still, out here it is quiet and still, time for gardening and some Hügelkultur. 20130617-081435 AM.jpg

A friend of mine makes his own here in the garden, and it is kind a interesting to see how it all ends up.

So I spend my time wisely, somewhat as a cotton ball. I have not written in a while, I see that my views are over 3200! Thank you for reading my thoughts and inner world! It moves me… I am not stuck, but it might seems like I feel a bit lost at the moment, not really know what to expect or demand from others. I am lost in this world where everything is a fantasy and the rabbits and cats are running! “Where are they going?” I still wonder about why they appear, and how it is that they are all black. They often appear when it is stressful around me or when people whom have wronged me comes to the surface.

I live with a bunch of guys, they are good ones and I laugh sometimes, it makes me feel weightless. I wish I could have this feeling all the time. Covering me up as a blanket that never ends.IMG_5244I feel kind of lucky that I have a friend that lets me stay with him, he is the best and the kindest man I have ever known! I am forever thankful for this gesture. I do not even know how to repay him? But know one thing, I will always be here for you, always!

The thing is that I have not been feeling so good lately and that is why I have not written in a while.. Hoping it will turn to the better side someday now…

Take care and be safe!