We have officially past our due date and I am wondering when she will escape from her cave. I have had Braxton Hicks Contractions for a while, but no real pain yet. Honestly my whole pregnancy has been pretty comfortable. The worst has been being so fucking sleepy all the time and now, feeling so huge and heavy. I threw up a lot and was nauseous in the first trimester, but survived. The pregnancy brain has taken over my life the past 7 months, so I have taken me-time and focused on my inner circle. Today the bloody show arrived and I hope this is a sign of labor, since our due date was July 14 and I really want a natural birth.
Wondering how it will be to finally meet my baby and how she will look like is coming to an end. Knowing that becoming a mom is the universe’s greatest love, makes me feel blessed, happy and calm.
I have learned through my pregnancy that the best thing is to just relax, enjoy, eat what you want in small amounts and not really plan anything. Of course the weight gain is weighing me down, but I know it is baby weight and will try to get back to a healthy body. It will probably not be done overnight, but there is time. Tomorrow we are going in for our past due date checkup and in a few days I will hold my little one in my arms.
for a second i thought my life was filled with something else. then discovering i am filled with a baby. blessed to give life to something completely innocent beautiful and precious that no one has ever met before. now learning from my experience that trusting my own body and listening to my souls is sometimes the only thing that seems right in this world. but as far as i know you only know about me and my insides. learning that there are early signs and that i have felt you growing inside me for a while now ; my obgyn says it has been 10weeks. i have felt the warmth ~ your heartbeats ~ movement ~ peace. i have cried ~ thrown up ~ smelled everyhting ~ breasts aching. so when i first saw your pictures i said out loud ; BABY ! and now you are everything in my life forever. i will promise you everything i can give you ; with an open heart ~ an honest soul. i am hoping for us to be everything you wish for. i will fight for and hope that you never feel unwanted. if someone does anything bad to you all you have to do is tell me. because for the rest of our lives and in eternity i will be your 엄마 my 아이 to be. remember always that love comes from our insides and sharing our lives is worth more than fame money and stardom. from now you are my all ; the one i will place first. and if you in the future will get a 동생 you will share this sunlight forever. so my 도담 사랑해요 항상 i love you forever. and when you learn to read you will read my written stories ♡
of course in my life love comes with heartbreaks. but i am trying not to fall because of my stomach is growing. for as now i know my life will change. but i also know we have time to find our own ways. but i have to go to a place i really do not want to live. but since this is for you 도담 i will do what is the best for you in this moment. never do i hope you will blame me for this. but i know you will question why maybe. but as soon as you are here on the outside of me i will explain and give you my all for eternity.
i am not rich but i have what we need and if you lack something i am saving for your future.